Section: Funny Life Quotes

“Life is short, so make sure your Wi-Fi is strong.”

“Life is short. Buy the candy, eat the cookie, lick the spoon.”

“Life is short. So smile while you still have internet.”

“My life feels like a test I didn’t study for.”

“My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry.”

“Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.”

“Running late is my cardio.”

“Some days you’re the pigeon, some days you’re the statue.”

“Sometimes the best part of my job is that the chair spins.”

“The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” by Joe Girard

“The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” by Lucille Ball

“When life shuts a door, open it again. It’s a door. That’s how they work.”